Backblast #894 The Final Countdown

AO: Johnson Park
Workout Date: 04/12/2022
QIC: Bald Eagle
PAX: Snoop, Toto, Kraut, Chubbs, Mad Cow, Soft Spot, Hasselhoff, Gravy, Humpty Dumpty, Bart Simpson
Pre-Blast: The finale of the March Madness competition - a picture of balls was sent to the pax. A lengthy, and irrelevant, document was also sent explaining the rules of the contest for pax wanting to practice while on spring break.

5 Core Principles: Free of charge | Open to all men | Held outdoors, rain or shine, hot or cold | Led by men who participate in the workout in a rotating fashion with no training or certification necessary | End w/ a Circle of Trust

The pax gathered around the construction laden Stairway to Heaven AO a little earlier than usual – most headlights were shining by 5:25 and pax emerged from their chariots ready for battle.

Basketballs were distributed based on color choice of the highest finishers. Sidenote – this ball color draft happened to be held the previous Saturday via Slack while I was at a minor league hockey game. During said game I was moderating the draft and looking at my phone while holding my son – the camera then turned to us and we were broadcast on the jumbotron – while I was publicly shamed by the PA announcer.

The general premise of the contest:

Pax earned points for doing “F3 Furthering” activities throughout the month of March (Q’ing, bringing FNG’s, Posting, etc.). Pax were matched up against each other in a bracket format with the winner advancing. The rules shifted each week by the Committee (composed of the Com-tator or Dic-mittee Bald Eagle).

As we got down to what would have been the Final Four, “The Committee” decided it would be best for the contest to be settled live and in-person, so he elected to keep all remaining seeds in the contest. What transpired below is said live & in-person contest. This contest consisted of 4 chances to earn points:

  • Points Accumulated / 10, rounded down
  • Telephone Pole Bowling
  • Michael Jackson Relay
  • Bucket Brigade Relay

These points translated into Free Throws at the Park at the top of The Stairs.
More made Free Throws translated into Fewer Reps required before being able to start The Final Countdown – making as many baskets as possible while The Final Countdown played.

The Thang

Mosey Lap & 15 SSH

Telephone Pole Bowling

  • One pax selected an exercise – Merkins/Squats/Burpees
  • He then walked as many parking spaces down as he wanted to. 1 Parking Space = 1 Point
  • He then rolled his ball toward the parking lot post trying to hit it.
  • If he hit it, he scored that many points, if he missed, he scored zero points.
  • If he hit it, all planking pax had to do the number of reps as parking spaces away of the exercise chosen. If missed, that pax needed to do that rep count of that exercise.
  • All pax rotated threw and points were awarded 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 based on finishing order.

Pax Moseyed to the Stairs

Michael Jackson Relay

  • Pax with balls drafted a partner based on their finishing order in the overall competition.
  • Relay was simple – if holding a ball, run up 2 landings and back one.
  • If not holding a ball, move forward 1 landing. Get ball from partner when he returns and progress 2 landings forward and back 1. W/R/R
  • Winning team in the match-up completed a bounce pass to their partner at the top of the stairs.

Bucket Brigade Relay

  • Instructions were given for the next relay at the top of the stairs – be the first team with all of your balls at the top of the stairs, and you are not able to move with a ball in your possession. i.e. you need to pass the balls to teammates, up the stairs, in the dark. If dropped, you need to retrieve the ball and the person that it was passed to needs to return to where it was passed from.
  • Teams were drafted, and Kraut won the day by selecting the pax who did not have balls in their possession, thus allowing for an easier completion of the task.
  • Pax moseyed to the base of the stairs, were given 30 seconds to strategize, and then began moving up the stairs.
  • After Kraut’s team reached the summit, they watched as Chubbs team continued forward with their glut of balls – two of which bounded in slow motion all the way down the stairs and across the road.
  • These balls were retrieved and all pax arrived at the summit.

Mosey to the court.

Free Throws

If you’ve ever shot a free throw in the dark, with gloves on, and slightly overinflated balls, you know that a formidable challenge lay in store for the pax…

The points earned tally was read to the pax. One final draft was held – the Com-Tator adjusted the rules to allow the pax with the fewest Free Throws earned to select first.

Free Throws were then attempted, and a few were made. Including a stellar granny shot by Gravy which was a brilliant strategy.

The pax then circled up in the center. The Finale involved completing Motivators from 6 and then making as many baskets as possible while The Final Countdown played. The reward for making Free Throws was that pax could peel off from motivators when we were at the number of Free Throws they made was hit – i.e. make 5 free throws, start shooting when we get to the 5 count of motivators.

A chaotic frenzy ensued with pax chasing overinflated carnival style basketballs all over the park. As the song faded one pax stood above the rest – none other than Mr. Toto, who netted 16 points.

The pax held the CoT on the court and then moseyed back to their chariots.


YHC would like to thank everyone who participated voluntarily or involuntarily in the contest. The contest generated some significant Mumblechatter on Slack and at the Workouts – with a few threads gaining over 100 posts.

T-Claps to Toto for the win, Snoop for the regular season title, Kraut for tallying the most points, Chubbs for driving to F3 Orlando while on vacation to earn points, Mad Cow for showing up after his rona quarantine ended, Soft Spot for his calculated last minute surge to tie Mad Cow and ultimately form team Mad Soft Cow Spot, and Hasselhoff for doing what it took to make the finals and making a solid showing.

Let’s keep this momentum rolling and stay tuned for the next CSAUP type activity – which may or may not be the next evolution of the NFS Challenge from Kraut.

Bald Eagle/Com-Tator Out